Deciding to start therapy is a big step, and it's completely normal to feel nervous, uncertain, or even skeptical. Many of my clients tell me they spent weeks (sometimes months) thinking about reaching out before they finally did. If that's you, I want you to know: there's no perfect time, and showing up as you are is enough.
Here's an honest look at what to expect.
Before the Session
After you schedule your consultation, you'll receive some intake paperwork. This covers basic information about you, your history, and what's bringing you to therapy. It might feel like a lot, but it helps me understand your story so we can make the most of our time together.
A few tips for the paperwork:
- You don't have to have all the answers, "I'm not sure" is a perfectly valid response
- Be as honest as you're comfortable with, we'll build trust over time
- Note any questions you want to ask me, this is a two-way conversation
The First 15 Minutes
I'll start by making sure you're comfortable and answering any questions about the process. We'll talk about:
- Confidentiality, what stays in the room and the few exceptions
- How therapy works, my approach and what you can expect over time
- Your goals, what you're hoping to get out of this, even if it's vague
There's no pressure to dive into your deepest feelings right away. The first session is about connection, not excavation.
What We'll Talk About
I'll ask you some questions to get a sense of your life, your relationships, your strengths, and your challenges. This might include:
- What's been going on recently that prompted you to seek therapy
- A bit about your background, family, work, school, culture
- How you've been feeling emotionally and physically
- What you've tried before (therapy, coping strategies, support systems)
- What feels most important to you right now
You set the pace. If a question feels too big, we can table it. If something comes up that you weren't expecting, that's okay too.
What I Won't Do
- Judge you. My role is to understand, not evaluate. Whatever you're carrying, I've held space for it before.
- Rush you. Healing isn't linear, and there's no timeline you need to follow.
- Give you a diagnosis on the spot. If assessment is part of your goals, it happens thoughtfully over time.
- Tell you what to do. I'll offer tools and perspectives, but you're the expert on your own life.
What You Might Feel Afterward
People leave their first session feeling all kinds of things, relieved, emotionally tired, hopeful, uncertain, or a mix of everything. All of that is normal. Some clients feel lighter; others feel like they opened something they weren't ready for. Both reactions are part of the process.
Give yourself some grace after the session. Don't schedule anything demanding right after if you can help it. Take a walk, drink some water, rest.
Frequently Asked Questions
Do I need to know exactly what's wrong? No. "I don't feel right" or "Something needs to change" is more than enough to start.
What if I cry? That's welcome here. Tears are not a sign of weakness. They're information.
What if it's not a good fit? That's okay. The therapeutic relationship matters more than any technique. If we're not the right match, I'll help you find someone who is.
Can I bring notes? Absolutely. Some clients bring a list of things they want to cover. Others prefer to see what comes up. There's no wrong approach.
Taking the First Step
Starting therapy takes courage, and you've already shown that by reading this. Whether you're dealing with anxiety, navigating a life transition, processing trauma, or simply want to understand yourself better, you don't have to figure it out alone.